Posts Tagged ‘silence’

It’s all silence in the end

January 22, 2013 Leave a comment

I had a bad long wakeup last night. A little after 2, I came awake, not needing to pee, not feeling any like my blood sugar was too low or too high. Just woke up.

And I realized how silent everything becomes. Think of the other kids you knew when you were growing up. Odds are that most of them now are forgotten and silent to you. I’m not the most social of persons, but even so, there are so many people that I once talked to or knew some. And now they are silent.

There was a bit of wind at times, that could be heard rapping itself against the windows and sides of the house. Then it would subside and I remained curled underneath a sheath of blankets. Mi pensadis. I was thinking and thinking. But nothing verbal came out of those thoughts and memories. I realized that they are becoming more profoundly silent with each day that passes, every night that I sleep through or ruminate through. That’s what will happen to each and every one of us. We will all be silent, and the memories that others have of us will too fade into whispers and then nothing, a fleck of ash that gets scattered into dissolution by wind.

I did later manage to slide back into sleep, and had a wicked nightmare.


I’m beginning to think there can be some good benefits to doing some squats every day. Yes, every day. I started doing this last week when I got the new sandbag loaded up and set down in the bedroom. Every morning, I get up and after I’ve had the first cup of decaf coffee, I pick up the sandbag, and squat it, 5 or 6 reps. The later, before I head off to the shower, I pick it up again and squat it for 10 or more reps. The last set is done after the shower and I just try to do 15 or more. This morning I did 25 reps on the last set Zercher-style, breaking parallel on each rep and never pausing.

Later, before heading for work, I went down into the basement to get a broom so I could sweep away the light dusting of snow that had fallen overnight. The barbell was sitting on the sawhorses and I got underneath it in a front squat position and squatted that up.

I’m not feeling overtrained so far. Mostly what I’m now feeling is a sense of growing strength in the legs, along with the rest of the body. The body is adapting to this extra workload. It sure makes me hungry at times and I’ve gone from averaging around 3 eggs per day up to 6, as one part of the extra food being consumed.

I need to put more weight in the sandbag though. It’s getting too light now. If I put in another 10 or 15 lbs, it’ll be a sterner challenge again. And force my body to adapt some more again.